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Introspection

by Karf

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1.
i’ve got a feeling inside my ear you're falling behind i've got this feeling in my left ear leave it alone all these things that I held so dear are pushing away just out of arms length i’ve found a sound that I just can't hear ‘you're never alone’ i never know what to say till it's over what to do till it's gone how to act in the moment how to stop till I'm going I never knew hopes were made to be broken life could be so short how to act in the moment I just didn’t know where to start (to start myself) all these leaves beneath my feet i don't have the time to turn every one though the stems how they run so deep just like the veins blue and out of reach she plans on harvesting your skin she needs to know if she can crawl inside this is all we know i didn’t know we could be so vengeful i never knew a grudge would last so long i never knew how to act in the moment i didn’t know you as well as I thought i didn’t know much of all the equations my heart beats ninety five a minute i didn't know what to say at the moment i just stood there, bewildered
2.
ambition faltered like a fading analogy that's all we need i know how to let go all i know is how so i erased myself, i shrieked and hid; you sniveling little i'm coming down. i'm calming down. i'll come inside. bargain basement, these clothes don't fit no more i can't hear your accent. i heard it got quite bored or drowned in merit, those phony phonetics you've adored. you're such a dork. while i'm sleeping, those elves do come and play i scare them away. oh lord god why today. while we're thinking that we're sinking everyone starts quoting scripture all of them are slowly sinking spouting their nomenclature we'll be mostly naked thinking "where the hell did all our clothes go?" all of them are thinking, "oh, this dopamine is wearing thin now." i've been thinking i'll go out with a bang and see these wars you fight but never gain i'm going over the concern you've adorned god what a dork i will watch my feet drag across the floor. i'll gain a charge and i'll meet you by the door. while we're mending broken bridges everyone shrieks and hides and all of them are coping, trying to hold all their salty tears in we'll erode the shore that led us to this hostile confrontation all of them are thinking, "this dopamine is wearing thin now" we've been stripped back we know that this is how we're supposed to end up reminding us of what we once were and how we'll never return
3.
C4 05:30
can we be introspective without coming off as needy? stare inside, there's nothing but dirt here, there's nothing but mud and the air we breath is tainted by those who are sullied with greed so can we be introspective without coming off as corny? there's no way out. there can be no compromise there’s no freedom bursting of me there’s no foreseeable way out. as for me and all the others, we're banding together to see if we even matter as a faction where we failed as one, will be succeed when we are many? most experiments conducted end up failing. attract the flies with the honey; attract by attrition. we failed the test, we smoked the stars. have you forgotten what you are? bring the light, i'll bring c4. we'll show ourselves up, if we don't blow ourselves up-- how dare we lead knowing full how much we tend to bleed, well, every shell shall break and every lawn we're gonna learn to make, so goes all of gods humble, and not so, concoctions and can we be used for the short time we have left to dwell here? there's no escape there can be no time rewind there's no answers bursting out of me there's no clean and easy escape there's no time to waste we'll gut the whole world we'll implant the wound lick my lips, all i taste is isobutylene
4.
escape 05:08
threw away all the pictures of you and me i cleared them all out of my mind, thats my only guarantee running through the ocean saying ‘hi’ to the fish in the sea all the crustaceans recognize hyperbole from the bayou to the capital of tennessee rings the echo of my sorrow of the fatality but you are gone all the times we faced alone all the times are fading its been a while and your face is leaving my memory its been a while and your face is escaping my memory sad brown eyes pierce right through me no expression tells correctly the amount of worry i have something to say to the deity wound me if you must but stay away from my family but you are gone all the times we faced alone all the times have faded its been a while and believe me this is out of necessity your face has escaped my memory please believe me this is necessity
5.
been on top of the bottom of the world looking down on people looking up it's all very ominous: the powers that be are bored with us high atop their mountain of filth made from broken lives and broken hope it's extremely obvious: the realm of nostradamus i've heard that shrill horn of fate tell the future is what past did make and we'll just have to learn to wait.. stall the dagger with the cape we can go round and round 'tll hell swallows us whole. if you say ‘we're bound by will" just one more time; let me interrupt you i feel that ships already sunk what worked for you didn't work for me. could you please kindly sit quietly i'm tired of this debauchery because the clock is ticking down towards out inevitable fate i feel i won't get more than i can take we can go round and round 'tll hell swallows us whole we could get really hard lined, corrosive empires would have nothing on us or we could lay our heads down, bury them with sand and pray it goes away but we know it wont
6.
Believe 03:06
theres places that we're running from theres places that we drown with rum those places, they're troublesome those places that you're running from you can't spell believe without the lie the people that we have become these people will not be outdone these people, they all have guns these people that we have become we can't spell believe without the lie the keg beneath all this distrust combusts and circles only your lies did you think i am so swiftly fooled by the lost look in your eyes? look around only to see that there is nothing left here for me oh so sad to see they are reminders of my lack of degree the spiders on the walls agree though they'd say nothing ill about me life is the web we can see we’re all tangled up and can't break free how quickly we live to forget these decisions we’ll learn to regret these webs, they should make you fret and like webs, life exists only to bring death but you can't spell believe without the lie. if you knew me, you would know where i was coming from when i pout but instead you’ve got no recollection to what i’m all about you think thats bad? try being so narcissistic day in, day out i’m the one who is ostensibly a cardboard cutout. i’m now alone and my covers been blown. i say, ‘you don't know me’ twisting the phone and i swear i’ll atone but the voice is disagreeing. ‘my how you've grown, you faced the unknown. but your lies have become you’ "i've reaped what i've sown, cuz i threw the first stone. but you can't believe the lie’
7.
thinking aloud, nothings worrying me the pale blue sky; omnipresent birds, they sing breaking my oath and dragging a sound signs of my illness bouncing all around i’m walking this road with my feet on the ground ignoring strife that clearly abounds stop and smile, to toss out this same frown i wouldn't do that, i'm just fucking around the end of the day is coming around tossing facades like a ball hits the ground please come in, but don't be making a sound i'm not asleep, i'm just fucking around thinking aloud, nothings worrying me the pale dead sky; all the lies they can't see
8.
Grasp 06:08
i thought i found it here, just beneath the tide the rocks were warm. they were close and taut seems i found the answer to a question i never asked even now i don’t wanna hear this shit come out my mouth cuz i have drowned this is my fallacy. this is my destiny. grasping at strawmen till my heart is empty tired and vacant eyes, they stare this is idolatry. this is killing me. grasping at strawman till my heart is empty tired and vacant eyes, they stare all i’ve figured out is nothing at all. even the insects have passed me by when the cold truth looked me right in the eye its gaze was one of those paralyzing visions its a stone to hurl. this ground was bound to break from a clear lack of canines in the sun you’ve got to accept this. you’ve got to rewrite this is my fallacy. this is my destiny. grasping at strawmen till my heart is empty tired and vacant eyes, they stare replace this. rewrite this. grasping at strawmen till my heart is empty tired and vacant eyes, they stare
9.
Little Boy 04:08
i’m physically fine but mentally fallen apart the way that things ended didn’t have to be my spark i must have thought it was right to think everyone else is wrong so i said, ‘please seperate yourself from me.’ but why must i? i’m just a little boy lost in my mind i’m alone in all the time i’ve worked so hard at this and that. i’m still alone. tried to take the tit for tat. it’s not enough. wrote the full of my heart down as it broke. transcribed my thoughts because i believed in something more than this it didn’t show looking back, i thought too much. everything i had was something i just didn’t want looking back, i had too much. every thought i had was one that i just didn’t want but why must i? i’m just a little boy. lost in my mind that i dwell in all the time. but how can i, frustrated little boy? compare with men that i’ve read so much on.

about

some songs are less than six months old, and some are over six years old. the theme remains the same.

credits

released January 28, 2011

written and performed by karl fite
guitar on 'believe' performed by chris johnson
drum loops provided by apple

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Karf Missoula, montana

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